Life is too short for this.
Transcend the bullshit.
So here's the truth.
I am so frightened of dying I
often imagine every intersection will be my last breath .
If I ever said I love you, I meant it.
That includes you.

I am done with being immature, for the moment.
Please believe me when I say that every dream I ever had was shattered when I saw the backs of your eyes. That's a half-compliment, but take it as a good thing.
People like us are enemies to this world, and I like that. I like the way I smile at children. I like the terrible job I do at hiding my tears. I like that I still remember details about every girl I've ever listened to. And I love how big my heart is.

I love how big my breath is.

I want to crawl into you with a wrench, and clear the blood clots near your zest.

But that's not my job.

I am an acrobat and a chimney sweep, a word-weaver, a son, a kurt, a Kurt.
A poly-para-psycho-quixotician.

and as of right now,
capable of elaborating on the effects of shooting for the moon.
(In summary; cold, but well worth it)

love

I Think

Far too often,
and not nearly precise enough.
6 letters haunt my existence:
Atomic
Gender
Middle
Hatred
German
Nigger
Father

None of which I am to blame, personally.
But all with which
inheritance checks are signed
and stamped. Sometimes
I believe those
around me should know
that I am only one of my father's choices.
I never voted yes on the Manhattan Project
nor did I believe pigment to be
a verdict.
But my ancestors did.
So please hold me accountable/responsible
for everything they ever wrote
on cave walls.
And parchment.
And clay tablets.
And history.
Because I have never been my own actions
and have never had my own idea(l)s.
I am only a megaphone with
which they speak.

Return to Zion

"Don't finish that bottle off,"
I tell her,
"I'll need something to
drink tomorrow night. When
I'm alone."
Stunning holograms
mimic folding screens,
portable partitions,
and castle moats.
Who dares to enter
this facade of a division?
If my eyes could fuck you,
we wouldn't need to
waste so much time
establishing foreign policy.
The worst nights are those
where I am too drunk to drive
but not drunk enough
to sleep.
But you left enough liquid courage
for me to face my nightmares
this time.
And for that, I owe my deepest empathy
to those who have none.
May resentment come
all too soon for the righteous
and disheartened.