Dedicated to the last 3 weeks of my job.

She only thinks
out loud, finding
a million ways to say
a million nothings.
Reaching deep for compliments
about her highlights
and slimming skirt.
I look at my chopsticks
and ask how hard I
would have to throw my face
to penetrate my brain.
It's been twenty five
minutes now and I'm
crawling with nausea. How can she
be so full of herself?
Then she asks how my day
has been, and
I realize
I haven't been
paying any attention to her
at all.
Sometimes, I'm too proud
to apologize.

To be shipwrecked

The head-rush is not
as instant as one
would think.
There is a settling
of iron in your
circulation, first.
Sweat retreats back
through your pores.
Then her empty
eyes ring like crystal
under a wet thumb.
And you pray to be deaf,
or blind.
Sirens perch on
her eyelashes,
inviting you into a paradise
filled with shattered hulls
and stories you don't get the endings of.
.....
possible nicknames continued
.....
Double-stitch,
sweet pea. Don't ever
let me rip you open.

Woof in Sheeeps Clothing

The want to know what I've been writing,
so I tell them.
.....
There were more blackouts
this week than normal.
And tonight,
when I laid in the grass,
I felt my hand touch a withered
dandelion stalk and mistook it
for someone next to me.
I suppose a more proper title would
be "What I am not writing."
Because in all honesty, the poems
exist in what I
leave out.

Possible Nicknames For You

Horse -
For carrying your long
face so proudly.
Jellyfish -
For transparency only
a mother
could love.
Still-Life -
see: your lips.
Dandelion -
For more than just the obvious
reasons. But I do know I never want
to see the color yellow, again.
Will continue list later.

This Weekend

Felt like a crash course in appreciating silence. And just when I thought it would be too much, I realized I had begun to enjoy not speaking. I've had my wings spread for the past two days and I am exhausted. It was a mission trip. And I come home, and feel as though I accomplished nothing.

This is going to be a tough-sleep night.

But in other news,
I've finished reading High Fidelity and have a Top Five list to celebrate.

Top Five Songs for Being in a Dodge Neon:

1. Punk Rock - Mogwai
2. Roxanne - The Police
3. Mosquito Repellent - The Mountain Goats
4. Wildflowers - Ghostface Killa
5. All Along The Watchtower - Jimi Hendrix

Would you like to know where hope is?

If so, let me hold your
palm under the rain. Feel
what it must be like to
catch your existence
by the tail. Parted,
but not split, from
an ego as large
as one could dream.
Sometimes there are
symphonies held
within the splatter. But
we don't have ears like that.
Like the sidewalk has ears.
She whispers (day in-
day out)
foot steps that smell so
exhausted, one could
mistake them for wanting
to rest.
But they don't want to rest
near the eavesdropping rain.
They know each symphony plays
far too loudly
in the dark. And
some of us must sleep. There is
work to be had
Grinning to be done.

Gamelan Orchestra

Let's continue,
strumming ukulele chords
until we sing out
of tune and shimmer
against the old man. The one
walking with a
bottle-neck girl dressed in brown.
Then watch them kiss
and never speak about
how jealous we are. Instead,
we laugh falsely and
deny we loved
like that.
Our lips weren't that dry.
When we loved,
darling,
the world
never stopped to take notice.
And neither did we.